Note: This piece contains mentions of death and dead bodies.

terrible misdocumentation has happened. total blasphemous un-uniform distribution of statistics on my computer screen. fifteen quadrilaterals. all rectangles, some squares. a collage of casualties in colour. death by chocolate. sorry, suicide. 


{ আত্ম: self, হত্যা: kill

the first news report reports the government’s apathy. the second just says “citizen.” they are from the same time. i was safe. both times. 

do death certificates qualify for document verification? 

what is the citizenship status of the corpse? 

certificates to certify 

probers to probe 

evictors to evict 

police to police 



on the news 

everyone lies but especially these reporters

A screenshot of a Google search yielding multiple results. In the screenshot, news clippings and thumbnails of deaths by suicide reported in the year 2018.

the third image displays the puffed face of my friend’s mother, her lover on the side. they hung themselves 500 metres apart on a video call, drowning in the sound of the brahmaputra. tragic, really. not shown — their suspension. the enraged petrified hangdog husband. i should probably text my friend. although i might be three years too late. a few more photographs: pendent legs / I quit; smoke on helmets / the aftermath of fire; wrist / bloodlessness. iceglass faces, presumably of children. separately, a blurred teen. some young singer in a yellow mekhela, performing on a বিহু মঞ্চ. a couple paintings. watercolour, i suppose. another random headline accompanied by bhupen hazarika’s face with someone who looks like my dad’s dead best friend. turns out my father and i have something in common after all. who would have thought haha. i must not digress. this poem is not about them. i’m not interested in their passing. don’t sulk. here, look closely. the search bar says <your name><cause of death><place of death><year of death> but fifteen quadrilaterals, all rectangles, some squares later, not one of them reports you.